Showing posts with label self mastery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self mastery. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Becoming your Ideal Self

I coached a young man who was finding the process of identifying his character and personality preferences, and integrating this with the behaviours (capabilities) he was choosing each day at work far too abstract. In an effort to make it concrete I related it back to his love of snow- skiing. He had skied from a very young age and in our sessions had often talked passionately about his skiing experiences. I suggested to him that integrating his personality preferences and character with his behaviour (capability) was like skiing ‘top to bottom’ down a black run (the black run is the most challenging run most of us can ski down in Australia.)

When your confidence and conviction in self mastery is well developed you stand at the top of the run, pick your line, bend your knees, lean forward in your boots, point your tips downhill and ‘go for it’ with an energy that is totally exhilarating. As you speed down the run you make corrections along the way but your belief in yourself sees you keep going until you get to the bottom. You are ‘in the zone’ – everything is aligned and everything is working together to support your choice of line and speed. You knew your skill was there but you did not need to focus on it – it was more about believing in yourself and wanting to experience the ‘high’ of picking the right line down the mountain. You are totally exhilarated and energised when you reach the bottom.

If your confidence is not well developed and you did not have this kind of integration of personality, character and capability you would ‘work your way’ down the black run – no ‘top to bottom’ for you. Standing at the top of the run you question your capability to get down and you talk to yourself about the capability level you need to bring so you can make it down – especially what kind of turns you need to make. You are highly aware of the terrain and the risks facing you. So you stand at the top of this slope and cautiously traverse across the top until you can pick the next few metres that appear ‘safe’. You continue this approach for the entire slope picking your way cautiously down and taking plenty of stops along the way to choose your next ‘path’. For most of the way down the slope you have doubts, feel fearful and even completely lost and out of control. You would feel relieved and exhausted when you made it to the bottom.

This story helped him to see and feel in a very concrete way what it meant to integrate his personality preferences, his character and his capability. It also helped him to understand why he was feeling so exhausted and out of control in the workplace because he had not yet managed to integrate his personality, character and capability. 
 
If you enjoyed reading this story there are plenty more in Mandy’s book – check out the information and order form on our website.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Finding your Sweetspot

The work of Martin Seligman and his colleague Mihaly Czikszentmihalyi have helped us to create a frame for finding your sweetspot. We acknowledge most of you have invested a significant amount of time developing capability – mostly intellectual skills – and you do not know enough about your personality preferences and character. 

For those who work feeling stressed, guilty or resentful it can so often be because they are operating counter to their personality preferences and character. Such leaders are finding their sweetspot very infrequently because they are defining who they are by their capability.
 
 As leaders decide to spend more time developing greater self mastery they create higher awareness of the personality preferences and character they bring to the way they use their intellectual capability . For those who want even further awareness they also explore ways to develop their emotional capability. When they do this they discover an enlarged sweetspot.
 
The ultimate sweetspot is where your capability is an integral ‘part’ of who you are but it is not what defines you. Your personality preferences and your character define how you interact and behave and you do this in a way that allows you to be at your best at all times. Feelings of guilt, resentment, anxiety are pushed away as you are ‘in the zone’ with how you choose to live with confidence, conviction and courage.

See more about Courageous Leaders on our website